Pillars to build a healthy home – Dr. Renny Samuel

Dr. Renny Samuel

Dr. Renny Samuel is serving as the Dean, Global School of Counseling at Center for Global Leadership Development (CGLD)

Our arrival into a family is not a choice that we make but one that is made by the sovereign God through His unquestionable wisdom. As he chooses to knit us fearfully and wonderfully in our mother’s womb, he also weaves us into a family – a relationship which is cultivated by our experiences together.

We witness this common theme running across the Bible, clearly portraying that the Word of God does not moot or mute the value of families. Probably, the definition of a family has been altered in today’s dictionary but the essence remains the same – There is always somebody around you who loves and cares for you and wants you to reciprocate that back. Experience would have taught us that to love and to live as a unit is costly and difficult, but who told you, love has a low price to pay? In fact, it cost Jesus His life.

In this stress-filled life that we live, I believe there are at least four essential pillars that a home needs to make it a special one.


Love: We can find the definition of love in 1 Corinthians 13:4–8a in the context of our relationship within the family. We need to make every effort to consciously love and allow that love to make all the difference.

Sacrifice: Where there is love, sacrifice is inevitable, and what better role model than our Master. Apostle Paul puts it beautifully in Philippians 2:3-4 on the importance of considering ‘my other’ better than me. Sow the seeds of sacrifice and you will find a new blossom on your family tree.

Forgiveness: Forgiving once is easy but forgiving the same person seventy times seven is what we are directed to do irrespective of the other’s flaws and weaknesses. To forgive is to ‘constantly give in for the other’ and to be egoistic is to ‘constantly have the other give in for you’. The Bible exhorts us to put issues to rest before the sun goes down.

Accountability: Many problems can be sorted out within a relationship if one can be accountable to the other in a family. Secrecy or hiding facts is a consequence of sin. Remember how Adam and Eve hid and kept their act secret before God. Just ask yourself this question, “Why do I not want to share this with my partner or to other members of my family?” Does you answer adhere to the principle of God’s truth? Accountability protects and builds a trusting relationship within the family.

We are living in days where families and relationships are breaking, perhaps some families are staying under the same roof but their hearts are miles apart. God can still restore a relationship provided we seek His help. Let us make an effort to live in peace and love as we celebrate our lives together.

Dr. Renny Samuel is serving as the Dean, Global School of Counseling at Center for Global Leadership Development (CGLD)

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